Posted by Dave On Saturday, August 6, 2011

Based on everything I've read about D3, here's how I'm expecting the Diablo 3 expansion pack announcement at BlizzCon 2013 to go;


Blizzard Entertainment, Inc. today announced plans for the first expansion pack to Diablo 3, its award-winning online action role-playing cash grab game.

Unveiled at the company’s seventh BlizzCon® gaming festival, Diablo 3: Raging Mists of Travincal will bring sweeping changes to the world of Sanctuary. Players will be able to adventure as one new playable race, the taxman, and take on new challenging zones that have twice the amount of item drops.

“In addition to the new referral systems, Diablo 3: RMT will add new features and a large amount of new items and loot for players to sell,” said Mike Morhaime, CEO and cofounder of Blizzard Entertainment. “We’re excited to be offering a first glimpse of RMT for attendees of BlizzCon, and we look forward to sharing more information with everyone as development progresses.”

There are a couple new zones and stuff, maybe some new quests, but all of that is insignificant compared to the major enhancements we have made to the game. This is what our players wanted, not what we wanted. New features coming with the game’s first expansion include:

  • One New Playable Class: The Taxman
  • More Loot: Monsters and bosses will be dropping twice the amount of items and gold now. All players can now sell even more stuff!
  • Casino: The much anticipated in-game casinos have been constructed at 30 locations in Sanctuary. Players wanted it, players get it! To avoid any possible gambling legislation issues, please do not refer to this as "gambling". These are skills-based virtual games and there is no actual gambling taking place.
  • Increased Storage Cap: More space for all of your items! Every player will now be provided a 400% increase to their storage space and bags.
  • Increased Gold Cap: To meet the demanding requirements of players that are having a hard time selling their gold. Fret not, even though there are 1 million players competing with you, it will eventually sell. This is the Blizzard Promise™.
  • Gold and Cash Arena: Implemented by popular demand! New interfaces available for PVP players who want to set stakes and cash limits for matches. Spectators can also participate by betting for real money!
  • Paid Pet Fights: Pit your pets against other in the Pet Cash Arena! For a nominal fee, new combat pets can be purchased in the Blizzard Store.
  • Pet Upgrade: Coming soon, players can upgrade their non-combat pets into an Arena-only combat pet for the small price of $25. Feed them, raise them, level them, turn them into fighting machines in brutal dog-eat-dog cage matches.
  • Stables: The world of Sanctuary now offers mules that can be purchased or rented, and follow you on your adventures. Mules cannot be mounted, but the extra storage space for all item drops will be invaluable!
  • New Banners: For those that want to show off the number of items sold, and how much you have profited!
  • New Achievements to Unlock: Examples such as "Millionaire", "Billionaire", "Greed is King", "Always Be Closing", "Pickpocket", "Auction Sniper", and "Time is Money.. Friend."
  • Referral System: When you get your friends to join, you will immediately receive a payment of 50,000 gold. Also, for every direct referral, you will receive a small percentage cut of their of the Auction House sales. For any indirect referrals (your friends make more referrals), you will be a smaller cut from those indirect friends as well. All of this cash will be trickling to you! (Note: This is not a pyramid scheme. This is the Blizzard Promise™.)
  • New Features: Blizzard is now implementing a new method to deal with the massive influx of gold beggars and solicitation since the launch of Diablo 3. All players will be placed in wealth brackets, where lower brackets cannot communicate with you. You can talk down to them, but the poorer classes will be unable to speak up to you. For a nominal fee, all players can purchase a service that upgrades them to a higher level class of Trade Chat and provide a 200 yard knockback effect to lower class players in your immediate presence.
  • New High-Level Content: Explore newly opened parts of the world that are offering even more items and drops that can be sold.
  • Mining Profession: Master a new profession to unearth valuable minerals and sell for more gold. Convert that gold into cash!
  • Improved Random Loot Generator: Creates even more random drops of unique items that can be sold for profit on the Auction House.
  • More New Paid Services: Only because you demanded them! For a small fee, Hardcore Players can be resurrected with all original equipment at time of death. We also have a new Gold and Cash Mobile Auction House to monitor your listings on the fly. Paid Mobile Chat to chat with friends, invite them to join the game and make easy cash!
  • Improved Authenticators: Our new version provides twice the amount of protection! It costs twice as much, but it's worth it. Since account hacking is on the rise, we are also implementing two new in-game authentication methods (free of charge) in addition to your personal authenticator.
It is anticipated that Diablo 3: RMT will become the world’s most popular online action role-playing cash grab game (OCGG).

For more information on Diablo 3: RMT, visit Blizzard Entertainment’s official website at www.diablocash.com. To keep pace with the continued growth of Diablo 3 as well as development on other Blizzard games, the company is currently hiring for numerous banking, financial, security specialists (with an emphasis on money laundering), promotional marketing specialist positions, and PR wizards.

(Cautionary Note: The Blizzard Promise™ is a trademarked property of Activision Blizzard Inc. and does not necessarily mean an actual promise. In fact, it's just a word that doesn't actually mean anything at all.)